This morning when he got up, he came downstairs. With his favorite blanket wrapped around his little body, he climbed into my lap and snuggled with me for a minute. I asked him how he slept after his bad dream. "I managed to get myself back to sleep," he told me. Then he was very quiet for a minute or two, quietly breathing his little-boy morning breath onto my neck.
He knows about 9/11. He's got a thing for buildings, particularly record-breaking ones, so of course the WTC towers figure into that base of knowledge. He knows about the Pentagon and about Shanksville. He's read a lot about them all.
He doesn't know, however, what things were like before that fateful day. He'll never know a youth without the threat of Al Qaeda and terrorism. Which seems incredibly daunting to me as a parent. There are people who want to harm Americans simply for being American. How can that be? How do we wrap our heads around it? How do we explain this to our kids?
But then I think about my own youth. What gave me nightmares? What left me awake in my bed, scared for the future?
Nuclear War. Specifically, nuclear war with the USSR. I was a mess for weeks after watching The Day After. It occurs to me that every generation has some sort of threat looming over them, something larger than us, something so seemingly insurmountable. Something Evil.
It hangs there, darkening everyday life until one day, things change. Walls come down. Peace happens. The inherent goodness of mankind rises again. That's not to say that nuclear weapons aren't still an issue, but they're not the same enormous, nightmare-inducing concern that they used to be.
One day, Al Qaeda won't be the dark enemy at the door, creating horror and fear, death and destruction. The cynical side me wonders, what will the threat be for Bubba and Daisy's kids? What terrifying spectre will haunt my grandchildren's nightmares?
The optimistic side of me, however, knows that no matter what it is, Good will prevail. Love will trump all. I have to believe this. For me...for my children...and for their children.
***
Several years ago, I recounted my experience of September 11, 2001. You can read that entry here.
2 comments:
Oh, so well done, Margaret. You got me thinking. I remember when I was a teenager I had the worst summer reading assigment. We had to read On The Beach, Alas Babylon, and Brave New World, all over a two months span of time. It scared the ever living crap out of me, and was the worst summer of my life. The Cold War, The USSR, it always frightened me, but it was because of what could happen, not what did. I know some day my children will want to know what happened and understand what we went through. I guess we can only pray they will never truly know.
Ooh, Maria...I could see how that reading list could affect you. I got shivers reading Brave New World in college. I haven't read the other, but On The Beach isn't exactly uplifting either...
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